May Day Bank Holiday Ramblings

I sat down at my laptop a couple of weeks ago and thrashed out a blog post – it wasn’t very inspired, more like a list of everything that’s going down (or growing up) in my greenhouse. I wouldn’t want to read it, and I couldn’t see any reason why anybody else might, so it has sat unpublished whilst I work out what I wanted to say next.

Every day I seem to have a long list of things to do – some days I manage it, and sometimes it goes out of the window. For instance, yesterday, instead of turning out my books and clothes (I’m having some major “I NEED TO SORT OUT MY LIFE” moments, which translate into gargantuan spring cleans) we decided to ditch everything and head out to Cambridge for the day. We don’t live too far away, and with the extraordinarily handy Madingley Road Park and Ride, for all intents and purposes it’s so easy to get into the town centre. You see, I have a new love affair with Cambridge. I feel at home there. Rich said in some ways it reminds him of Edinburgh, and I agree. It’s almost as if the place lives and breathes history – there’s always a sense of what was living alongside what is and what will be. I’ve now decided that I’d like to live closer to Cambridge, before I make my big move to the coast. One day.

But back to my little plot, my little bit of England, and things are all going a bit higgledy-piggledy, as I knew they would by now. With the burst of summer that was thrown at us a fortnight ago, everything surged ahead, ignorant of nature’s summery false start. In the greenhouse the peppers and chillis are growing slowly and diligently, and I have high hopes for strong plants that will fruit abundantly this year. Likewise the kale and cabbages are doing well, perhaps because I am much more attentive this year, and they’re not being fried alive in the Smallest Smallholding Valley of Death, aka the conservatory. The greenhouse staging has somehow forced me into a routine of care, as I no longer forget to water my seedlings and visit them at least twice a day to find out how they’re getting on. Funny how a piece of furniture can have such a positive effect.

The woodland strawberries were sown weeks ago but are yet to show any signs of life; I fear I may have bought a duff packet. The leeks are also growing with purpose, looking strong and sturdy, yet I can’t help but brush my hands over the tops of them, and let the tips tickle my palms. There’s something very relaxing and almost hypnotic about standing in your greenhouse, and sweeping your hand over your tray of leek seedlings. I thoroughly recommend it. In the words of Mrs Doyle “go ooonnnnnn”.

Of course the grass and weeds are surging ahead at an unforgivable rate; at least, unforgiving to me as our lawn mower has packed up and at present, I’m forced to borrow my mother’s electric mower with a blade measuring just 30cm in diameter. Not only does juggling the extension lead and mower lead require great skill, but mowing takes half a day and makes me cross. We’re getting to that time of year where I begin to feel bad tempered towards my Smallest Smallholding; it teases me, refusing to be tamed and reminding me exactly how insignificant I am when it comes to me vs. the forces of nature. I blame the bindweed. It’s a bad influence. But armed with my spade, and a lot of (blood) sweat (and tears) and determination, and possibly a book on permaculture, I shall one day conquer it. Ha!

Actually, things have been getting out of hand a lot earlier than usual this year. No doubt hundreds of bloggers across the country have noted the early arrival of spring/summer, and here it is no different. The bluebells and wild garlic have already filled my local woodland, at least two or three weeks earlier than ‘normal’ – whatever ‘normal’ is these days. The honeysuckle and clematis montana are already out in force and over a fortnight ago our first blackbird fledglings were out on their own.

So strange.

But then, the past month or so I have been feeling strange. Very, very occasionally I’ll have this feeling that my life is changing by small, almost imperceptible degrees. It’s hard to explain, but it’s a definite feeling of life moving on, or up, or sideways – just changing. Maybe it’s growing up, I don’t know. Sometimes it feels right and sometimes it leaves me feeling as if I never have enough time and I’m always behind it – I’m not moving fast enough with it and it’s leaving me behind. In fact, lately I’ve been feeling as though I’ve been wading through a quagmire and not making much progress at all – things are on hold, I’m never changing or moving and I’m going to be stuck where I am – financially, emotionally and socially – for the rest of my life.

Hence the massive spring cleans. It’s like getting read of my past’s detritus – those bits I cling on to and won’t let go because somehow I’m scared I’ll forget what it was like to be a slightly oddball teenager with passions and imagination and high hopes for the future. But in reality that translates to holding onto old clothes, scuffed up panpipes, oil burners, books that I will never, ever read again… as if I will never be that interesting or imaginative ever again if I let these things go. And living in a house that resembles a building site is like living some sort of lifestyle purgatory. I can’t stand that feeling. In a way it drives me to do more, achieve more, get something – anything – finished. My book would be a good starting place. Oh I know what you’re thinking… oh yes, another ‘would be’ novelist, nice dream, fat chance. But writing and being a writer is the only thing I’ve ever really wanted to ‘do’ or ‘be’, and as acting looking a less and less likely option for me, writing is something that I think will satisfy all the different parts of me. Gardening, growing veg, loving wildlife and attempting to live self-sufficiency is part of my lifestyle, what makes me happy. It all mixes in together. Writing is something that I want to do for a living. About time I made more of an effort! And stop making excuses and found the time.

Happy May Day.

Remember, you can keep up with my daily thoughts, ramblings and more pictures at the Smallest Smallholding Facebook Page.

Ready, Steady, Blow!

Batten the hatches!

It’s REALLY windy today. At least my new greenhouse panes are still in situ though – hurrah (above is a picture of me trying very hard to get the pane to fit).

I should be rattling through some freelance work at the moment, but the truth is, it’s gone 10am and I’m propped up in bed under my duvet and blanket, flanked by a snoring cat, nursing a sore throat after a rubbish night’s sleep disturbed by rattling and banging (in the house, not in my throat!). Since the flu I just haven’t been able to shake this slightly itchy, sore, irritated throat so I think I’m going to have to go back to the doctors. Of course, I looked it up on the Internet and it could be any number of very scary, very horrible things. I don’t know why I try and self diagnose. I always end up scaring myself witless.

So hopefully it’s just something very simple and very bland that can be treated easily.

ANYWAY.

Last week I tried a natural shampoo recipe that had been hailed by a journalist as a wonder product that would leave my hair strong and shiny. It was a simple recipe – one tablespoon of bicarbonate of soda mixed with 2 tablespoons of water. I thought I’d give it a go as I’d very much like to reduce the number of synthetic chemicals I use, and this seemed like a viable option.

To be honest, I don’t think this journalist has ever used this recipe (I’m pretty sure he was actually lacking in the hair department), because it WRECKED MY HAIR. I knew it wouldn’t lather, thanks to a lack of that oft-maligned ingredient sodium laureth sulfate, and at first it actually felt like quite a nice exfoliating treatment. I rinsed it off and left off the conditioner just to see if it did leave my hair lovely and shiny. It did not.

No, my hair was a tangled mess that knotted when left unbrushed for a few minutes, felt dry, rough and very stiff. I applied a tiny amount of olive oil, which did help with the condition, but it still hung in stiff strands and lacked any of its normal shine.

Generally, my hair is in pretty good condition despite the fact that I regularly blow dry and straighten it (my hairdresser is quite surprised by this), so I tried it again with conditioner and it still did not work at all. I’ve no doubt that it *cleaned* my hair… but it was just too harsh. It made my scalp even worse and my hair hung stiffly, as if I’d applied a lot of hairspray or been swimming in the sea and left it to dry. It just looked dull and was for all intents and purposes quite unmanageable.

To be fair, Poppy over at A Life Less Simple did give me a few pointers as she thinks that the bicarb can affect pH levels of your hair, which can be re-addressed. She suggested putting cider vinegar in the rinsing water, and said that she uses a mix of old tea, vinegar and bicarb for her hair. I didn’t get around to putting her suggestions into action, but I might give it a go again… I’m a little wary though as it took my hair a good three or four days plus a hot oil treatment to get back into shape. Although I’m not preoccupied more than most with my looks, I am a bit precious about my hair because it’s one of the few things that I’m content with.

I don’t know, maybe I’ll give it another go with a different recipe. There’s a lot out there and obviously I need something moisturising for the ends and gentle on my scalp. We’ll see.

In other news, I’ve been madly buying up vegetable and herb seeds, and so far have far too many for my allocated home growing space, but I’m still not finished yet. I’ll find a way to fit it all in. I haven’t really looked at buying in flower seeds yet, as I’m preoccupied with finding space for edible produce, which may have to grow in spaces in the borders. I think as long as I’m able to grow lots of nectar rich plants in between my shrubs and veg, I’ll be happy with that. Incidentally, thanks to some recommendations on my Smallest Smallholding Facebook page, I’ve now purchased Permaculture in a Nutshell and will be interested to find out what changes I can make.

Aside from starting my potatoes chitting, I haven’t sown anything as yet. I’m itching to get growing and get out there, but it’s just not *quite* the right time. Some stuff can be started off early, and if I was any kind of good lifer, I’d be attending to my winter produce right now, but I’m a slighty scatty, decrepit young lady and it hasn’t worked out like that so far (although, I have an inkling we’re going to have one last cold snap before spring). I think it’s forecast to piddle down all weekend, but now that my greenhouse is fixed I feel a bit more cajoled to get on and sow a few bits and pieces and make a very rudimentary start. That’s if the greenhouse doesn’t get blown away in the meantime…

I turned 28 and then it was 2011

Happy New Year!

I’m well aware that blog-wise, December was a washout for me. As you may or may not have read in my last blog post, I spent the majority of December either being too stressed or too ill to do anything interesting or Smallest Smallholding-related. It felt as if my laptop had become a permanent fixture, an extension of my eyes, arms and hands… in a way, being horribly ill with ‘flu probably gave me a much-needed prolonged break and saved me from becoming pixelated or something.

I’m *still* not back to full health. I think it’ll take at least another couple of weeks. It really knocked me for six and left me with a lethargic legacy. Friday – New Year’s Eve – was my 28th birthday and I started the day with a bath, followed by a trip to my doctor. I’d been getting waves of nausea, had no appetite, was coughing a LOT and at that time was still prone to flagging after only being up and about for a couple of hours. He assured me I’d had ‘flu, that it could be a couple of days or a couple of weeks before I’d be fighting fit and just said to ride it out, rest up and look after myself. Needless to say, the rest of my birthday was quiet. I went over to see my Mum, Dad was working, sister was ill, my aunt dropped by and I think everyone else was either busy or preoccupied with NYE. Such is life.

I did get some lovely gifts. Hunter wellies, no less. They make me feel VERY posh, and I’m really happy to have wellies that will last me a very very long time. I also have some seeds to sow, a new pair of secateurs, lots of new pairs of gardening gloves, bubble baths, thermal socks, a new bag, earrings, a new hairdryer (my ancient one was sparking and frying my head) and just lots of lovely little bits and pieces that I’d never allow myself the guilty pleasure of buying otherwise.

Rich and I didn’t even realise that new year had arrived. We were curled up on the sofa watching a DVD, and only realised that the clock in our lounge is slow by at least 5 minutes as the fireworks started going off well before what we thought was midnight. I’m not bothered. It’s almost like a sigh of relief when the year is over, especially when we’ve managed to avoid major disasters or tragedies. I think the couple of years leading up to Nannie’s death really scarred me in that way. I hope one day I’ll have that slightly sad feeling that a great year is over, rather than that relieved feeling. Still, I remain hopeful. I like New Year. Although I still harbour that feeling as if I’m bracing myself for impending disasters, it’s not as strong as it used to be, and I do feel that the coming year will be a year of change, and of good things.

I was looking back at last year’s ‘new year’ post. I do like making resolutions because I like to challenge myself to improve, to progress and to achieve. Here’s what I wrote last year, and my succinct assessment of each resolution:

2010 Resolutions – Smallest Smallholding

1. Grow loads more onions. Er. I grew more but didn’t get to eat as many as I wanted thanks to rot. I’ll go with a partial success.

2. Get better at composting, feeding and sustaining my crops this year. I WAS RUBBISH AT THIS. Fail. Try again this year.

3. Plant more sunflowers. Success, although they still bent in the windy weather.

4. Plant a nectar bank. Fail. Definitely want to concentrate on getting this done this year.

5. Add to my woodland gardens. Success. Partially. Could do better, although there were improvements.

6. Use my greenhouse to its full potential. FAIL, FAIL, FAIL. 2011 is the year of my greenhouse. Staging, repairs, cleaning… it’s all going on this spring.

7. Have an outside eating area. FAIL. We did make some inroads with this but nowhere near enough. Another project for the summer. I’m going to be one busy bunny.

8. Dig an asparagus bed. Roaring success. Rich did this. His asparagus are growing wonderfully well, but I do point out to him in slightly envious tones that although he does very well, he only looks after his asparagus. I do everything else with varying degrees of success.

9. Grow veg in hanging baskets. Fail. Again, time/organisation issue.

10. Grow a variety of food that I will actually eat. Partial failure, I’d say. Blackfly, lack of organisation and stupidity didn’t see me make the most of what I had. We’ll try again. I will nail it. Eventually.

2010 Resolutions – Non-Smallest Smallholding

1. Learn to relax. Partial success. Getting there. Learning to deal with life stuff is a long process.

2. Explore Britain. Partial success. Last year I went to Wales twice (Cardiff, and the Llyn Peninsula), Edinburgh (again), Cork in Ireland (non-UK, but still exploration). Would like to explore the western side of the UK more – Welsh borders, south west and maybe south coast.

3. More autonomy. Hell, yes! During 2009 and the beginning of 2010 I was pretty miserable. But I decided to change things, and I think I’m getting the balance right. I still need to work harder, improve my skills and focus more this year. But I think we’re getting there.

4. LOSE WEIGHT. SUCCESS! This summer I really started to get trim. Although, I did start piling it on again in the winter. But this ‘flu saw me lose almost 3/4 stone, and I’m going to be very careful to not put it back on. I don’t need to.

5. More self sufficiency! Hmmm. Fail, sadly. 2011 is going to be expensive all round – rising prices, VAT, etc etc. Self sufficiency is one way to bypass the extra expense in the long run.

6. Write more and Blog more. Ummm. No, fail I think. I have several projects lined up for 2011 though, so I imagine I’ll be scribbling and tip-tapping away this year.

7. Eat more greens. Fail. I need to eat more green stuff.

8. Bake more. Fail. I need to set aside time. I do enjoy it.

9. Walk more. Success! Not only did I walk more, but I ran. Spring/summer was great. I was running 5ks. I was proud of myself. I’m going to do it again, and even better in 2011.

10. Books! Partial success. Recommendations are always welcome.

So there you have it. A mixed bag if ever there was one, but I did make some important changes last year, most notably running, my job and my general attitude.

I don’t think I’ll have so many resolutions this year. For sanity’s sake I’ll try and keep this one a bit shorter:

2011 RESOLUTIONS

1. Take up running again and try to enter a charity 5k.

2. Be careful and considerate about what I grow, and try to use everything that I manage to harvest.

3. Get my greenhouse up and running, and use it to its full potential.

4. Plant lots of wildlife-friendly flowers.

5. Don’t stress when it all grows out of control. Do what you can, when you can.

6. Write some more magazine articles. Get them published.

7. Take time out with Rich to visit new places and have new experiences.

8. Get my finances under control. Wipe out as much debt as possible and get out of my overdraft.

9. Get some of the house renovations finished.

10. Spend at least one or two days a week away from the computer – give yourself more time to get those Smallest Smallholding projects finished (e.g. eating area, herb beds, finish fencing, nectar bank).

There you are. Pretty simple. Bring it on 2011. But please – be kind to me!