The Art of Conversation
I have been very pleasantly surprised over the past few months with my new(ish) allotment. I am from a generation that don’t greet each other in the street with a smile and a hello, even if there’s miles of lone pavement and only you and the other person crossing paths.
I was surprised when my other half Rich came up to live with me, and he’d say hello to people as we passed them while out walking in our local park. I was even more surprised when they smiled and said hello back! He said he’d always done it when walking his dog back home - I found it a strange phenomenon, but in time have come to do it more readily now.
But down at the allotment, almost from day one for me, there has been a sort of camaraderie, where everyone says hello and has a quick chat regardless of whether you’re a newbie or an old boy.
My neighbour on one side is a young woman in her 30s, really lovely and on the occasions that we’re there at the same time, we exchange greetings, have a quick chat about how things are going. I still don’t know her name though! On the other side is a woman in her 50s or 60s, who came over to have a chat the first time we were both working on the same afternoon.
Further up is an old boy who launched into conversation as I made my way up my allotment sidepath. Very open, had a chuckle. It’s nice. Another young guy in his late 20s waved at me and my Mum as we drove out of the allotments one day.
As I said, I have been part of a generation that looks the other way, bows their head or pretends to rummage around in a bag or wallet, fiddle with a mobile phone or iPod. Anything not to make uncomfortable eye contact, to acknowledge someone else is there. Having an allotment for me has partly opened me up to the art of conversation with strangers. Strangers who, through conversation, become familiar acquaintances. And perhaps one day, even friends?
June 14th, 2008 at 8:02 pm
You are totally right, last year I grew my veg at the back of the garden so it has been a revelation to get an allotment this year. Now a trip to water the plants might take twice as long if you are lucky to bump into someone willing to have a quick chat. At my allotments you have to pass some mystical 6 month mark before any of the old men will talk to you, it was a great honor for me to get my first conversation about the weeds!
June 16th, 2008 at 3:42 pm
It would be a very dull old world without a chat. People tell me the most extraordinary things, I love it.
June 17th, 2008 at 11:58 am
I love saying good morning to all unsundry you get to spark up some of the best conversations going and meet people you might never get to meet otherwise, being ever so slightly nosy helps as well. One day I was walking out of the village and said good morning to an old chap in his front garden I’d never met before, noticing he had a green house I asked him about his veg and he invited me to look at his veg gardens and told me some of his secrets. But what I really love is when you get chatting to someone and it turns out they do or have done something you just wouldn’t have expected like pensioners who were spys or strippers or just
people who have weird and wonderful jobs like collecting pig semon.
June 18th, 2008 at 4:37 pm
I know what you mean. I tend to wave to people if i end up in west wales or west coast of scotland in my car…it’s just polite. I think the days when people were neighbourly are long gone.